Nocturnal Decisions

Alex Palhegyi

We left before sunrise, a good friend and I, but it could hardly be called morning, for we had not slept.  Our eyes were still wide, swollen open, full of optimism, as they reflect the glimmering shimmer of city lights.   Through the vociferous voices of city cars.  All keeping us on our toes, all letting us believe we could go anywhere in the world.

Take me out, tonight
Where there’s music and there’s people . . .

“This album is fucking amazing!” I interjected.
“God ...  I know.  I want this! I want to create something beautiful.  I want to do something that matters! God ...”
“But we can!”
“I know, we need to.  We need to be beautiful.  We have to do something!”
“I know!  We will.  We have to! ! !          !                   !                                 !!     !                      .”

And in the darkened underpass I thought Oh God my chance has come at last . . .

The song lead us across the freeway junction, and we were now on the I-Five, heading dead north.
“So you know how to get there pretty much, right?” I had to reassure the both of us.
“Yeah, it’s just off the Five, and we’re there, pretty much.”
“Ok, I was just making sure –“
“--We’re fine.”
“Alright.”

And so we drove, up the northbound pass, a route notorious for its inspiring fields of generic vegetation, its comfortable stretches of consistent pavement, and its unmatched collection of themed roadside diners, a real treat for the hungry and desperate.  I started to think about where we were headed, and why we were headed, and I remembered that I had forgotten what and where that was.
I saw a bull fucking a cow from the passenger window.
“Hah, that’s beautiful!” I pointed out.
“What?”
“Oh, nothing, just the mountains, they’re really pretty, nevermind.”  

Farmland somehow turned to forest, where the only light was that of our highbeams dancing about the fog.  We kept the windows down to avoid the silence of our own voices, only to let in the icy echoes of the mountain air.  We watched our eyes constrict the light, until we could only see the guiding yellow lines that painted the highway.

The Sun eventually ascended us from the confusion of night, and the colors it brought along were truly angelic.
“Didn’t we leave at sunrise?”
There is a shade of blue that only exist in the wake of the morning.  It is electric, bringing all that it touches to radiate in its stillness, a fluorescent spectacle that only nature could keep humble.  
“What?”
Azure skies like this can only last a moment, and they vanish the instant you glance away to put on you shoes.  But this morning, I didn’t glance away.  I didn’t put on my shoes.  I didn’t go to work or class or do anything that might ever really matter.  Today, I watched the morning sky stand still for eternity, and I never wanted to leave that car.
“Nevermind.”